Bible Games, aka What Would Jesus Do?…Hadouken!!!, aka And On The 8th Day, God Did Say, “You got PWNED, Noob!!!”

June 7, 2010 in Posts by Rick Bockwinkle

A funny thing happened to me the other day. Well, not so much funny as strange. And not so much strange as boring to anyone but me.

After a brief visit to the local church, a place I’m not known to frequent outside certain holidays, the parish priest opined to my grandmother that he would be thrilled if I could write something for the church newsletter.

(I’d like to take this opportunity to plug www.geeks.co.uk, where you can find more articles by me and other fine writers about games, music, movies, gadgets and more. End plug.)

Not being religious in any organised sense, I elected not to write it, in the interest of not needlessly offending religious people. And because Futurama was on. But it got me to thinking about how I could write something about things I like in the context of religion. Presto change-o, Bible games.

Some might consider the following to be blasphemous, but as a gamer I don’t. Besides, I’m pretty sure the presence of games based on the Bible is already tantamount to blasphemy. Not because they’re turning their followers’ guidelines for living into the kind of thing those same followers usually protest over, but because it seems that pretty much every Bible game is complete and utter shit.

Whether it be the fact that the dominant colour scheme in these games seems to be brown, or the fact that in their zeal to convert young kids to God they forget to program in things like collision detection and jumping, Bible games are by and large just  …continue reading Bible Games, aka What Would Jesus Do?…Hadouken!!!, aka And On The 8th Day, God Did Say, “You got PWNED, Noob!!!”

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